Full Touchscreen Control
Touch screens look great, but they don’t exactly enhance your driving experience by themselves. In the case of Tesla cars, they actively detract from the experience by having almost every function (wipers, HVAC, even signals) only accessible via that infernal piece of hardware.
Reboots
If the infotainment system didn’t sound bad enough already, add to that the need to reboot it frequently enough that it may as well not even be there. Indeed, sometimes the only way to get around its own bugginess is to just switch the thing off and be done with it. Enjoy not being able to access even the most basic of functions while it comes back online.
Misaligned Panels
Arguably, one of Tesla’s greatest strengths is its vehicles’ distinctive, almost box-y appearance. While it’s certainly eye-catching from afar, closer inspection has sometimes revealed plenty of gaps and inconsistencies between the body’s different panels, which really puts quite a dent in Tesla’s brand image.
Yoke Steering Wheel
As one of the world’s leading electric car manufacturers, Tesla is always looking to innovate on traditional car engineering and design - but the last thing that needed an update was the steering wheel. The yoke steering wheel that is common among most Tesla models could hardly be called a wheel, anyway, and its uncomfortable design and awkward grip have made it the bane of many Tesla owners.
Soft Turn Signals
Changing lanes or turning a corner is always preceded by a satisfying click, assuming you actually use your indicator and that you don’t own a Tesla. Indeed, the folks over at Tesla made the bold decision to remove any sense of tactile feedback when you use your turn signal, much to everyone’s confusion and chagrin.
Storage
You may not like the general aesthetic that Tesla has imposed on many of their most famous models, but there’s no denying that it is distinctive and eye-catching. Unfortunately, they forgot to make it practical in any sense of the word since the minimalist design offers very, well, minimal storage options.
Unintuitive Controls
We’ve already discussed Tesla’s obsession with touchscreens and how this detracts from your driving experience. Unfortunately, it may also put you in harm’s way because having so many options only accessible from one (proportionally) tiny screen means you’ll often be taking your eyes off the road just to switch from one menu to another.
Software Updates
Like your smartphone, tablet, or desktop computer, Tesla cars receive the occasional software update to keep them running at their best. Unfortunately, that also means you’ll have to endure several dysfunctional features and limited functionality if something were to go wrong during the update process - which it often does.
Limited Compatibility
Do you appreciate the novelty of being able to integrate your Apple or Android device with your car’s infotainment system? If you answered yes, tough luck - Tesla’s proprietary infotainment system doesn’t offer any compatibility with other devices, at least not without jumping through several hoops.
Unresponsive Touchscreen
Again, the annoying touchscreen! As if it weren’t bad enough that you have to ask your touchscreen for permission just to activate the wipers, sometimes the thing doesn’t even work. Like any bit of software, it’s prone to occasional lag and choppiness, which wouldn’t be such a big deal if it didn’t literally control everything.
Voice Commands
If you’ve ever made use of Siri or Google Assistant, you should already be familiar with the struggles of trying to enunciate a command to an AI that must be hard of hearing. In all their wisdom, the wonderful folks at Tesla thought that you could do with a little more frustration in your life by adding their own voice command system, which is just as inconsistent as all the others.
Battery Costs
You may get the impression that we aren’t exactly Tesla’s biggest fans, but make no mistake: electric cars do have their place. Unfortunately, sometimes, the very thing that makes them appealing can also be a detriment. In this case, having to replace the battery is an expensive and tedious process that most of us could do without.
Phantom Braking
On paper, the Full Self-Driving system (or FSD for short) is a brilliant innovation. In practice, however, it could probably use a little work, especially when it comes to braking. The FSD often applies brakes unexpectedly without any discernible reason. At the very least, it makes driving an edge-of-your-seat experience in a very literal sense.
Strange Noises
With the threat of death hanging over your head around every corner, driving is already an anxiety-inducing experience. The strange rattling coming from the suspension system only makes it more terrifying, though you could say it adds more suspense. Okay, not our best one.
Power Steering Problems
Power steering may be one of the greatest automotive innovations, and Tesla was right to implement it in their vehicles. However, due to the electrical nature of their cars, things can sometimes go wrong, and the steering has been known to be unresponsive or erratic at times.
Noisy Cabins
At low to moderate speeds, you could hear a pin drop in a Tesla cabin. Any faster, however, and the wind becomes an unbearable cacophony that may make you want to jump out of the cabin right then and there.
Mobile App
It seems every other company is releasing a mobile app for whatever product they release, and Tesla is no exception. However, they may want to get their programmers to take a look at the app since it is frequently reported as buggy or slow, which sort of takes away from the whole “remote control” aspect, doesn’t it?
Excessive Notifications
If you’ve ever received a Facebook notification regarding your co-worker from two jobs ago or that distant cousin who you’ve never spoken to, the Tesla app should be a familiar experience! It’s just as annoying and intrusive as every other app you already tolerate!
Limited Third-Party Apps
If you’ve enjoyed using apps like CarPlay or Android Auto in your vehicle, prepare for disappointment since Tesla doesn’t allow any third-party apps and integration features other than its own.
Sentry Mode
You have to give Tesla credit where it's due: they have no shortage of good ideas. Sentry Mode is one such idea, essentially an autonomous form of security for your vehicle. Unfortunately, keeping it running is a huge drain on your battery.
Limited Service
Electric cars may indeed be the future, but it’s going to take a while until everyone is behind the wheel of a Tesla. Until then, Tesla owners are going to have to suffer with limited service centers, long repair times, and a lack of support.
Repair Costs
Teslas are “premium” vehicles, and with “premium” quality comes “premium” repair costs. Out-of-warranty models, in particular, cost at least both arms and one leg, given that the parts are so specific and not readily available.
No Loaner Vehicles
It’s customary for many manufacturers to offer loaner vehicles if yours is ever sent back for repairs. Unfortunately, the good folks over at Tesla don’t abide by traditional customs and won’t provide you with any substitute transportation. Well, a little cardio never hurt anyone.
App-Assisted Service and Repairs
Did you know that you can schedule a repair or request a service via the Tesla app? “Can” is the operative word here in that the app has a built-in service request option. It just isn’t any quicker - or convenient - than scheduling an appointment via more traditional means.
Replacement Parts
With repairs already taking as long as they do, Tesla would do well to ensure that parts are readily available. Well, they would do, at least, but they don’t.
“Exaggerated” Capabilities
Tesla’s Autopilot system may have been marketed as Knight Rider-adjacent, but its functionality is less KITT and more Herbie. Simply put, the Autopilot system isn’t nearly as advanced as it claims to be.
Lane Tracking
Indeed, the Autopilot system begins to fall apart as soon as the lane you’re driving in encounters a slight curve, with the car swerving erratically to keep up.
Limited Suspension Options
Owners of the Model 3 and Model Y, as well as other earlier models, will have to contend with limited suspension options, leading to plenty of damage to the undercarriage. At least those willing to give the company even more money to pay for a newer model won’t have to deal with this!
Software Bugs
Software updates are intended to keep your infotainment system operating at its peak, but as any software designer will tell you, sometimes addressing one bug creates another. While this is barely tolerable with mobile devices and consoles, it’s downright dangerous with cars.
360-Degree Camera
The Tesla has cameras all around the vehicle for added security, but for some reason, it still lacks a 360-degree bird’s eye camera view. While it’s hardly the most egregious sin the company has committed, it’s hard to ignore the omission since many of its competitors do offer the 36-degree camera.
