Dodge Challenger Hellcat
The Challenger nameplate has been around for about as long as the Mustang, with the Hellcat being faster, larger, and louder than previous models. All that may sound appealing to someone looking to recapture their youth. Of course, few are able to actually handle the Hellcat, and the huge fuel costs don’t help.
Chevrolet Corvette
You’ll notice that we didn’t include a specific model year for this entry. That’s because, in spite of numerous changes to its design over the years, the Chevy Corvette has always been a symbol of cool and rebellious youth. It’s a terrific car, loud, fast, and flashy, but it’s also the stereotypical “midlife crisis” vehicle, and most people won’t be able to keep up with its intense maintenance needs beyond a few months.
Ford Mustang GT
The Mustang (and specifically the GT trim) sits right alongside the Corvette as one of America’s most iconic vehicles. And with a powerful V8 under the hood, it’s pretty potent, too, while still being relatively affordable. Of course, with its cramped interior and steep insurance hikes, it’s not exactly an ideal family car.
Porsche 911
The Porsche 911 was - and still is - the dream car of many youths all over the world. Sleek, stylish, and prestigious, owning one certainly makes an impression regardless of your age. Just be sure you can stomach the 911’s hectic repair bills - you may be better off putting that money towards retirement.
BMW M3
Unlike some of our previous entries, owning a BMW at an “advanced age” isn’t out of the ordinary. Plenty of middle aged people drive one - of course, they’re often also pretty loaded, and the M3 (or any BMW model for that matter) can be pretty unforgiving when it comes to maintenance costs.
Mercedes-AMG C63
Just like BMW, owning a Mercedes-Benz is totally acceptable, provided you have the funds needed to keep it up and running. The AMG C63 specifically, however, is often too firm for daily commuting and also depreciates incredibly fast, making even reselling feel like a fruitless endeavor.
Audi R8
Compared to Mercedes and BMW, Audi has always come off as the more exotic of the Big Three prestige brands. The R8 dials that quality up even further, becoming an “accessible” supercar with stunning good looks. Of course, that’s often not enough to compensate for its sheer impracticality, and the paranoia that comes with leaving it parked anywhere.
Nissan GT-R
When it comes to sports cars, Nissan has often found itself at the top of many people’s wishlists. The GT-R provides you with tactile, video game-y driving thrills and incredible performance thanks to its “handcrafted” engine. Unfortunately, like many of the vehicles on this list, it suffers from steep maintenance costs that make it impractical to own..
Mazda MX-5 Miata
The Mazda MX-5 Miata is almost cliche in how well it fits the “bachelor’s sports car” aesthetic. It’s absolutely sleek and nimble, but it’s also tiny - like, really tiny. Needless to say, you won’t be dropping the kids off in one of these, if you can manage to fit inside one yourself.
Tesla Model S Plaid
EVs are also incredibly popular with the tech-obsessed, middle-aged crowd, and no other EV is more impressive than the Tesla Model S Plaid with its bonkers acceleration. Of course, the appeal quickly wears off, especially when you consider that its range drops off significantly under cold weather conditions.
Jeep Wrangler
Nothing screams youth like a massive SUV capable of crushing lesser vehicles beneath its tread. Sure, the Wrangler’s all fun and games if you actually drive it the way it’s meant to be driven. Chances are, though, that you won’t be, and will instead have to contend with a noisy cabin, exorbitant fuel costs, and unwieldy urban handling with little payoff.
Ford Bronco
If a Jeep is just a little too far out of your price range, you could settle for a Bronco. It’s got the same off-road cool factor that middle-aged dads just love. Like the Wrangler, however, it’s loud and not very fun to drive in the city, and the removable top is nothing more than a cheap gimmick.
Mini Cooper S
The Mini Cooper S probably isn’t your idea of a typical mid-life crisis vehicle, but all the signs are there if you look a little deeper. It’s got a youthful charm and quirkiness to it that most “adult” cars simply lack. Unfortunately, it’s also wildly impractical, and costs about an arm and a leg to repair.
Harley-Davidson Fat Boy
No list of mid-life crisis purchases would ever be complete without some mention of a Harley-Davidson, or any loud motorcycle for that matter. Don’t get us wrong, these are exceptionally cool if you’re 12 or part of a gang. For everyone else, however, it’s heavy, expensive, and often uncomfortable.
Ducati Panigale
Not a chopper fan? Maybe an Italian superbike is more your speed. And that speed is certainly exceptional. Of course, actually riding it is a lot less comfortable than you’d probably like, and the maintenance costs are downright merciless.
Chevrolet Camaro
You could put any Camaro trim in this spot - the nameplate has been associated with youthful rebellion since it first hit the roads way back in the 60s. But while your younger self is probably whooping and hollering with excitement, the reality is that the Camaro just isn’t very practical, especially when you factor in its terrible blindspots (courtesy of its petite windows).
Toyota Supra
Toyota isn’t exactly the most prestigious brand name on this list, but the Supra has plenty going for it that make it stand out from the rest of the lineup. Of course, the novelty of its supercar stylings quickly wears off, forcing you to contend with its limited cargo space and stiff ride with no upsides.
Lexus LC500
The good news is that Lexus has plenty of classy executive cars that should appeal to most middle-agers. The bad news is that the LC500 isn’t one of them. It’s essentially a supercar, which immediately makes it impractical for daily use.
Lotus Evora
The Brits have given us plenty of fantastic vehicles over the years, and the Lotus Evora may just be one of them. It's lightweight and undoubtedly good-looking, but it also comes with iffy British reliability. Combine that with limited service networks in the US and you have a recipe for shockingly high maintenance fees.
Hummer H2
Nothing screams “Notice me, please” like an oversized pseudo-military vehicle. The Hummer H2 is certainly imposing, but it’s also what many people would refer to as a “gaudy monstrosity”. Needless to say, you’ll always get plenty of attention while driving one of these - we just can’t guarantee it’ll always be the good kind.
